Adult syllabus week

Walking to the first day of class across the quad in your new backpack, but make it *commuting on the subway to day 837 of the job you're sick of in your beat-up Zara loafers*

First day of the 8-3

Fellow readers, I am so sorry. Your weeknights have not been updated in quite some time. I hope you are now being updated while watching the debate!! In full transparency, I’m going through a very busy and weird period coming-off of summer and transitioning back to my old but also new NYC life. Following a slow end to August – where days were filled relaxing with my parents by the beach – this year’s NYC “adult syllabus week” has come-in hot and filled me with all of the same anxieties that I used to feel as a student in early September. While I often look back at this time with fondness – back to school shopping, reuniting with friends, showing-off the summer glow, fresh haircuts, and new planners – I forgot about that nebulous, queasy feeling that also came hand-in-hand with the start of the year (my brain’s calendar year will forever start the Tuesday after Labor Day), and this year, it has hit me like a freight train. Last week’s “first day” at work (day 847, but who’s counting) as well as various weekend #1 social events (including an actual “back to school” party) sent me into major over-thinking mode, spiraling over:

1. How to socialize / be normal

2. How to be human and do basic things

3. What to wear

(The things I would do to replace these September stressors with the “will I have enough time for lunch with my friends in between Geology and Econ?!” ones).

What’s ironic is that despite nothing in my life really changing besides my living space, the new apartment/neighborhood/roomies have inevitably made every day feel new, and therefore, anxiety provoking. Adjusting to new commutes, routines, people, and spaces has thrown everything into question – Is this what my life should look like right now? Why am I even going there? Who do I really want to see? How do I want to show up? What do I wear/say/think/do!? It’s all been making me feel very existential and like I need to have all sorts of dramatic things cooking in my life in order to answer the dreaded “so what’s up with you these days?” or “give me your life update!” questions (I am so guilty of panic asking people this, and I’m so sorry). Some crazy responses I’ve overhead recently:

1. “I might move to Hong Kong”

2. “I’m starting a company”

3. “I’m buying a boat”

You know who you are, and I will support you until the day you die. However, I do think the timing of it all is funny. There’s a palpable energy that’s around us in adult syllabus week right now: The end of long, slow summer days + a blossoming chill air + the recognition that we’re getting old = the September Surge. *I guess this is the whole “Demure August vs Brat Fall”? idk* Whatever it is, I’ve been watching this energy manifest into everything from rogue late night DMs and spontaneous large purchases to crazy haircuts and marathon sign-ups. It is absolutely WILD out there right now. Personally, I am trying to stay sane and ground myself amidst the change while also ~welcoming in~ a new and exciting year ahead:

My strategic advice nobody asked for

Cheers to a hopefully more relaxed few weeks ahead with less existential crises and more Take Four on the lawn before econ class (@colby). I shall see you soon with a fun new piece on work culture once my life chills a bit. <3